Superman V - Part 4
Written by Fred Walker, Edited
by Fred Walker and Marvelite
SUPERMAN V DOOMSDAY
A screenplay by Fred Walker
Based on a novel by Roger Stern
"You'll Believe a Man has Died!"
(Author's note: The basic concept here is to do a "Death and Life" storyline within the continuity of the previous Superman movies. The title is a Latin pun. It can be read either as "Superman 5: Doomsday!" or "Superman versus Doomsday.")
Continued from Superman V Doomsday Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3
EXT. IN FRONT OF THE TOMB -- DAY.
Crowd is cheering. Police are deliriously happy. Henderson pumps their hands.
Congratulations! What wonderful news! Lois,
you must be so happy!
Uh, what did Batgirl just tell you, Inspector?
HE IS RISEN!
MONTAGE of press reports, this time proclaiming Superman's resurrection.
MONTAGE of CRANKS AND PHONEYS, mostly fat and out of shape, some black or hispanic, and a lot of women, with S on their chests in homemade costumes, all claiming to be the resurrected Superman.
INT. LOIS' OFFICE AT THE DAILY PLANET -- DAY.
"Superman" is here to see you.
Every one of the phoneys has been seeking
my endorsement as the "real" Superman.
I don't want to be bothered.
You might want to consider this one. He says he can fly!
Furthermore, I think I can see him outside
your window right now!
He chuckles and EXITS.
She opens the window and SUPERBOY flies in, wearing a leather jacket and groovy shades. This is not Young Clark -- this is Post-Crisis Superboy, who is unrelated. He flashes Lois a sexy grin, kisses her on the mouth and then claims a chair, leaning back and putting his feet on her desk. She sits.
The feet come off the desk or the ass gets kicked.
The feet come off the desk.
So, who are you, anyway?
He struts around the room before answering, making himself at home.
Who am I? Well let's see. I have an S on my chest.
I can fly. I have super-powers. I'm hangin' at
The Daily Planet, and I just put a liplock on Lois Lane.
Why, I must be ... SUPERMAN!
Superman? Superboy, more like. Do you shave?
Despite my youthful appearance and boyish charm,
I am SuperMAN. I was cloned from the stolen body
by the Cadmus Corporation. You'll want proof, natch!
He demonstrates his powers, flying around the room, lifting her DESK with one hand and lighting 2 CIGARETTES with heat-ray vision. He puts them both in his mouth to do so, but Mr. Sophisticated chokes his lungs out. She pounds his back and pours him a GLASS OF WATER, putting out the cigarettes.
Are you sure you're invulnerable to lung cancer?
I'm -- gasp! -- pretty sure.
LOIS POV. She uses Superwoman's x-ray vision to confirm.
So far, anyway, thank goodness.
What was that?
BACK TO SCENE.
Never mind. You were saying?
I'm here to offer you a once in a lifetime
opportunity to match the offer I've already
got from The Cat Grant Show. Call me
irresponsible, call me what you will,
but I feel sentimental about the Daily Planet,
where I used to work, for old times’ sake.
He rattles on, as actor AD LIBS self-serving patter.
He must be some kind of a phoney,
because I know Superman's body wasn't stolen --
the footprint proves it. Nonetheless,
Superboy was obviously cloned by somebody,
and that somebody could be the same person
who created Doomsday. I'd better keep him talking.
How much did Cat offer you?
Six figures, baby -- six figures!
A hundred grand?
No, six figures. And mama! you should see
the figures on those babelicious hotties!
Other than hot and cold running call girls,
has Cat offered you any money?
We, um, haven't talked a dollar sum yet.
Lois touches her INTERCOM.
Jimmy. You have to see this.
Jimmy ENTERS, and meets Superboy. There is testosterone in the air.
Jiminy Crickets! Who's this?
Superman, to hear him tell it.
Superman? He look more like Superboy.
Superboy lifts Jimmy off the floor by the scruff of his neck.
I hate being called that!
Put the boy down. Now.
He puts Jimmy down. Jimmy chokes and gags a little.
I think that we should test him.
You're on, copy-boy! Just name it!
Jimmy paces and scratches his chin. At once he snaps his fingers.
I've got it. As we all know, Krypto the super-dog
is never far from his master.
Jimmy gives a wink to Lois, who plays along.
Why don't we open the window and Superboy here ...
... can call Krypto. If Krypto shows up,
he's the real Superboy.
K-Krypto? Are we talking about flying dogs here?
I mean, yeah, sure, as you say, Krypto is never
far from his master. Hey, I was playing fetch
with good ol' Superdog a little while ago,
I'm sure he's still around.
Superboy opens window and calls.
Here Krypto! Here boy! Good boy, good dog!
Fly in the window. Here, Krypto!
(trying to restrain laughter)
Jimmy, load your camera. You wouldn't want to miss
this touching reunion.
He smiles and loads it. Superboy breaks a sweat, and whistles.
Here, Krypto. Good dog ... Heh heh I don't know
what's keeping him.
KRYPTO the SUPER-DOG flies into the window, and Superboy pats him on the head. He playfully licks his master's face. Lois is stunned. Jimmy starts frantically taking pictures.
Jiminy Crickets, what a scoop!
Good dog! And you remember your old pal Lois, don't you?
Krypto runs over to Lois, wags his tail and starts humping her leg. Luckily it's a newspaper office, so there's always a ROLLED-UP NEWSPAPER handy!
Lois swats Krypto.
Bad dog! Bad dog!
Krypto whimpers in a corner.
Jimmy, don't you dare run out of film!
It's him! It's the real Superboy!
He must have broken through the time-barrier ...
CLOSE-UP on Krypto.
Whatcha gonna do now, Superboy? You know, Superboy ...
Jesus is Lord!
Jimmy faints dead away. Lois finally gets it.
Matrix, this is not funny!
Jimmy jumps back up.
Actually, Lois, I thought it was pretty funny!
The Matrix morphs into a brunette superheroine in pink tights and cape with an M on her chest.
We got you Lois, we got you good!
They all start laughing at her. Lois is angry at first, but then joins in. It's her first real laughter since the Death of Superman. She laughs till she cries and it ends in a big group hug.
Oh, thank you guys, I needed that so badly.
They pull up CHAIRS to confer.
I guess I should give you my real origin.
I was cloned by Cadmus, but not from Superman.
They were trying to create and patent their own
superhero for corporate purposes.
When Superman died I was rushed into production.
What do you mean rushed into production?
I went from single cell to single guy in a few days.
I did a story on this. Cloning has gone too far.
People are claiming copyright on entire species,
just because they did a little breeding,
and the courts are backing them up.
It's only a matter of time before somebody makes
a test-tube baby, the baby has descendants,
and a race of people is owned by a company.
The general idea was that I should breed,
which is why I was given an overactive sex drive.
Have I told you that I prefer older women?
Lois threatens him with the rolled-up newspaper. Then she offers him a job.
I've got an opening for a sidekick. Do you want it?
Superboy and Jimmy look at each other, both shocked.
I'd love to, but the job is taken.
I don't need your charity, pal!
Renewed male tension.
Jimmy Olsen isn't my sidekick. Jimmy Olsen is
my partner. He needs a sidekick.
This puts a new complexion on things! Superboy seems reluctant.
Oh all right. Hey, are you still The Boy of 100 Faces?
102. I picked up a couple more since that comic book came out.
Cool! You can give me some tips. I'm in the market
for a secret identity. With my hip sense of humour,
I was thinking I could be a nightclub comic.
What do you think of the name "Andy Jones?"
Hey, you could be a chick-magnet with a gimmick like that!
Of course, the chicks will be wearing sensible shoes,
and when you get them alone they're in for a big surprise.
You see, there's already a comic in town
named Andy Jones. Let me tell you about her ...
Lois shoes them out.
Now you boys play nice. I have to talk to Mae.
Superboy and Jimmy EXIT, chatting hair and wardrobe.
You changed your costume, Mae. Thank you.
That means a lot to me.
Lois, I do what I do because the world
needs a Supergirl. I'm clumsy at it.
But I know how much you loved her,
and I'd never deliberately hurt you.
CLOSE-UP on handshake. ENTER Perry.
Somebody find that flying boy-toy and get over
to Met U. Doomsday's body is missing!
EXT. METROPOLIS U. MEDICAL SCHOOL -- DAY.
Dr. Sanchez paces about nervously checking his watch and looking up at the sky. POV as 2 distant forms resolve themselves into Jimmy in the arms of Superboy and Lois in the arms of The Matrix. They land and introductions are made. If Dr. Sanchez is surprised by the lineup, he remains silent.
Doctor, we came as soon as we heard. You know
Jimmy Olsen. This young lady is The Matrix,
in her "true form." And this -- well,
it's going to sound funny, but this is Superboy.
SuperMAN ... oh what the heck. Superboy will do.
I'll inquire as to origin stories later.
The monster is missing, and that takes priority.
INT. METROPOLIS U. MEDICAL SCHOOL -- DAY.
Dr. Sanchez shows Lois, Jimmy, Superboy and The Matrix the room from which Doomsday's corpse vanished.
LOIS POV as she pokes around, snooping.
It was here just yesterday. This morning, gone!
You don't suppose there's any possibility that
Doomsday might be alive!
Team Superman look at each other, worried.
No chance of that. There's no forced entry
or exit. Doomsday would not sneak out quietly
in the middle of the night -- he would cut
a swath 4 lanes wide through Metropolis!
The only possibility I can think of is that
the resurrected Superman needed his enemy's
body for some purpose related to his mission.
MALE VOICE (OFF)
So why don't you just ask me?
THE ERADICATOR crashes through the ceiling. He is wearing a black Superman costume and a visor.
Never fear, Superman is here!
(to Dr. Sanchez)
What seems to be the trouble, good citizen?
For one thing, are you going to pay for that roof?
Dr. Sanchez was being sarcastic, but The Eradicator doesn't "get" sarcasm.
He considers it.
Let me think about that for a minute. No.
Did you steal the body, Supe?
Lois glares at Jimmy, as if to say, Don't call him Supe!
Not only did I not steal Doomsday's body,
I have in fact just arrived from the Fortress
of Solitude to investigate the matter.
Describe the Fortress ... in detail.
Team Superman gather round. All seem prepared to accept this latest pretender, if Lois says it's him. The actor playing The Eradicator should strongly resemble the actor playing Superman. It might even be a dual role for the same actor, or a set of brothers like the Baldwins or the Quaids.
Contrary to the movies, which show it as
a large crystalline structure with an open-
concept interior, it is in fact a hollowed-
out hillside, with a giant door
that can only be opened with a giant key.
The key is yellow in colour, because
I don't trust The Green Lantern completely.
Inside, I have a number of rooms dedicated to
my closest friends. The Perry White Room.
The Lana Lang Room. The Jimmy Olsen Room ...
You look like him, I'll admit. What's with the new costume?
It is a rebirth, a new beginning.
Hmm. When did you ever wear a visor?
Alas, my vision-powers have not returned.
I will wear a visor until they do,
for fear that good citizens will count on
x-ray or heat-ray vision to save them.
Bogus! You wear those shades for the same reason
I do -- our eyes are the wrong colour!
Superboy swats off The Eradicator's VISOR and crushes it underfoot. Eradicator clutches at his eyes as if strong light now hurts them.
Where I come from, you've just been punked out, tough guy!
(remains calm and composed)
Where you come from is a test tube, young man.
Well okay, you got me there, but it was a tough
test tube. It was the toughest test tube
on the rack. It was dirty and it had crack in it
and everything! Hey, how did you know?
Because I'm Superman. Matrix, you have control
over all the molecules in your vicinity. Would you mind?
Not at all. Superboy, that was not cool.
I don't know if he's hero or villain,
but breaking the glasses of a blind guy is not cool.
CLOSE-UP as she uses her psi-powers to fix his visor and helps him put it back on. Beat or two, then she gets it.
Hey, just a minute. I spend my time imitating
Supergirl, and that wasn't one of her powers.
How did you know I could do stuff like that?
Because I'm Superman.
Lois walks over to him, full of purpose. She can be intimidating, when she sets her mind to it!
Excuse me. "Superman." Do you even know who I am?
You are Lois Lane.
A reporter for The Daily Planet.
You have been called The World's Best Girl Reporter.
You were the first reporter to interview me.
Except, or course, for Clark Kent.
I believe ... that there was some talk of love.
Is that the best you can do? Speaking of Clark,
what do you hear from him?
(cold and blunt)
Kent is gone. There is only Superman now.
This calm, emotionless statement devastates our heroes. For the first time, they are forced to consider the possibility that Clark Kent might not be Superman -- and if he isn't, then Clark has been missing himself now for an awfully long time. Their friend might well be dead, even if "Superman Lives!"
I regret the pain this news may cause you.
My superhearing detects a good citizen in danger.
Up, up and away!
Eradicator EXITS, flying.
PHONE RINGS. Dr. Sanchez answers it.
It's Bruce Wayne for Lois.
She takes the phone.
SPLIT-SCREEN as Lois talks to a lab-coated Wayne in the Batcave.
Lois, it's me. I've got bad news ...
Batman! I know your voice! Why were you
pretending to be Bruce Wayne?
Because, um ..
(clearly ad libbing)
... this isn't a secure line, and I didn't know
who would answer. If someone knew it was Batman
on the phone, they might try to trace the call
to find out my secret identity.
Oh right. That makes sense.
It does? I mean, sure it does! Listen, Lois.
I've completed my tests on the dust.
The dust? Oh, that dust. So?
It's stone dust. Masonry-quality stone dust,
of the kind you buy at gardening supply stores.
I think you can guess what that means.
Lois turns pale and starts to shake uncontrollably.
God No! Could it be some sort of mistake? ...
No error, Lois. Stone dust. Sorry.
Then we were right. We were right all along.
We thought he was dead -- the whole world
thought he was dead -- but after all these years,
that bald maniac is still alive!
SPLIT-SCREEN ENDS. She hangs up and tells them.
It's stone dust. He aged the Lair with store-
bought dust so it would look unused if we
ever found it. But that homicidal maniac
has been down there all along plotting, planning ...
Down in his hole, he didn't even know Kara was dead.
Don't you see? HE'S STILL FIGHTING THE CRISIS!
She turns her attention to the empty GURNEY. LOIS POV as she looks it over.
I sure hope it was Superman who stole that body.
INT. MAD SCIENTIST'S LAB, PARTS UNKNOWN -- DAY.
Various masked HENCHMEN are working over Doomsday's BODY on a Frankenstein-like EXPERIMENTAL TABLE. In the shadows, we see a BALD MANIAC sitting in a chair and supervising. We cannot see his face.
All is in readiness, Master! Recussitation can begin.
Excellent! Everything is according to plan.
Except, of course, that the big ape was
even stronger than I dared hope, Reynolds,
and made his escape too soon. Before he was ready
to be decanted, as those fools at Cadmus would say.
Little do they dream his true potential,
a potential that only I, his creator can tap.
Doomsday -- a splendid name. I hadn't even thought
to name the brute. But soon, he will have a new name ...
a name that will strike fear into the hearts of all men!
A name that will live through ages of infamy!
He wheels his WHEELCHAIR into the light. It is the face from the statue at Luthor's Lair.
The name of ... THE ULTRA-HUMANITE!
To be continued.
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